2022 In Review

January

• Elmo’s hatred of Rocko takes over the world, for a day or two. “He’s a ROCK!”
• So much COVID, because masks are difficult, and mutations outpace vaccines. Oh, and capitalism wants us milked dry, so good luck taking enough time off if you get sick.
• Hedy can’t handle the vet anymore either. Our dogs have become bigger homebodies than me.
• Kurt Vonnegut: Unstuck in Time finally comes out. I kickstartered this flick in 2015. I won’t say it was worth a 7 year wait, but it was very enjoyable. It’s available on Hulu now.

Awareness is like the sun. When it shines on things, they are transformed. – Thich Nhat Hanh

February

• Ordered and tested a bunch of nicer masks. Because the upcoming cruise has mask requirements, and negative test requirements. And it’s time to do this right.
• My annual cortisone injection for Plantar Fasciitis means I get to post some really unnerving pictures again.
• Russia invaded Ukraine. Somehow a bunch of chest-thumping “Patriots” are on Russia’s side now. You could safely ignore those idiots, they’ve been completely fucking insane for over a decade now, but they’re EVERYWHERE.
• Purchased an Electric Kettle and our Tea Game goes up to 11 for the remainder of the year.

It’s better to spend money like there’s no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there’s no money. – PJ O’Rourke

March

• Hedy is 10! When Hux has his 7th birthday a few weeks later, he just gets a hamburger, Hedy got a full blown cake.
• Drove from Tampa to Fort Lauderdale, by ourselves. Because someone thought her job was more important than hangin' with her dear friends.
• Joco Cruise actually happened.
• Ryka Aoki (SF Writer) played Magic with me, The George Lucas Talk Show made me laugh ridiculously hard, and Dessa blew my socks off. Oh, and my wife’s crush on Janet Varney went into overdrive.
• Went ahead and paid for the cruise in 2023, that will be our 5th, and the last we’re committing to.
• Will Smith slapped Chris Rock on stage at the Oscars.

Good guys don’t always win, especially when they are divided and less determined than their adversaries. The desire for liberty may be ingrained in every human breast, but so is the potential for complacency, confusion, and cowardice. And losing has a price. – Madeleine Albright

April

• Got to a friend’s Super Soft Birthday Party in my bests Surly Dan outfits. I end up wearing the same things 6 months later for Halloween, pretty sure none of the people at that b-day party were trick or treating in my neighborhood.
• Michelle goes on her annual Girls' trip. I watch Stop Making Sense for the 11,000th time.
• Musk makes an offer to buy twitter. For $44 billion dollars, the shareholders say, “Sure.” Remember that when the richest of the rich decide they want to do something, they can do it. Then think of all the things they choose not to do.
• It was 69F at 4:20PM on 4/20, and I took a screenshot of my phone to commemorate. No, you’re a child.

A dead end street is a good place to turn around. – Naomi Judd

May

• My HS best friend turned 50, his daughter’s senior concert was that night, so I went, got some culture. Seeing so many of friends and family be good parents is absolute magic.
• Mom and I went to Frankfort for Mother’s Day, but the capital was closed, so we just visited a bookstore, had lunch and enjoyed a lovely drive.
• Saw a car with a bumper sticker that said, “John Prine lyrics make us better human beings”
• After a customer cancels an order, I get a discount on a couple of Bunsen and Beaker Muppet Replica Dolls from @bxpersonified.

Fuck you. Pay me. – Ray Liotta (as Henry Hill)

June

• Take a roadtrip up to Columbus IN to meet an internet friend, like it was the 90s or something. I might have committed to going to a Phish concert with him next year in Indy.
• I’m pressured into attending Snowflake Summit in Las Vegas. I make a joke on twitter about how when I die from COVID, at least I got to network one last time.
• The conference happens to start on Michelle’s birthday, so I take her with me, and we have a fantastic meal at Lotus of Siam (look it up) and go see Beatles Love again.
• I’m the only guy that got home on the day he was supposed to, though I did seem to catch COVID in the airport. Michelle got stranded in Atlanta 2 days prior. Everyone else in my travel group spent a Friday night in airports around the country.
• SCOTUS’s month of Shame. They rule against separation of church and state by allowing state funds to go to religious schools. Then they ignore the actual facts and actions of a coach’s prayers at public events. They kneecapped the EPA and Native American sovereignty. And they also say the state you’re in has some sort of bearing on whether or not you actually control your own body. States are stupid relics of an era when people and information travelled on horseback.
• Metafilter friends sent me a Babka to help me convalesce from the COVID.

We don’t discuss business at the table. – James Caan (as Sonny Corleone)

July

• Thanks to a really great season of Stranger Things, Kate Bush’s “Running Up That Hill” hits #1, 37 years after release.
• Fucking fireworks. Seriously. It’s enough to make me hate freedom.
• In a 2 week time period I got over Covid, had a Colonoscopy and then had to get a Crown. Getting old is dumb.
• The James Webb Space Telescope, which really should just go back to the name “Next Generation Space Telescope”, releases its first pictures. This baby is wild. And it is exactly how tax dollars should be spent.
• Absolutely loved Ms Marvel. Who knew Partition as a plot point would show up on Disney+?
• We lose a solid week at home to a goofy game called PowerWash Simulator on XBox. It does what it says on the tin, y’all.

The idea is not to block every shot. The idea is to make your opponent believe that you might block every shot. – Bill Russell

August

• Discovered that a bug I’d filed several times was caused by my own windows date/time settings being set to non-american values. I am much chagrined.
• “A big lump with knobs. It has the juice.” - CEO of Corn
• Remember the guy that lip sync’d the Fleetwood Mac song while riding a skateboard? He shows up in a couple episodes of my favorite TV show of the year, Reservation Dogs.
• I spend 2 weeks in 8 person meetings with a vendor and people that I try hard to not deal with more than very briefly.
• I wore my new NASA t-shirt the day the Artemis launch was scheduled, so of course it was scrubbed. Sorry folks.
• New tile floor is installed in our entry way. But before it’s installed we learn we did have lovely original heart pine floors under the weird stuff they’d put on top. But it’s ruined by glue and removal efforts.
• After doing the Van Gogh Starry Night Lego set, we decide to make sure to get to the Beyond Van Gogh exhibit before it leaves town. It was really really nice. Would have been nicer to be in there with 1/3rd the number of people.

Peace is not unity in similarity but unity in diversity, in the comparison and conciliation of differences. - Mikhail Gorbachev (Nobel Peace Prize lecture)

September

• I worked all Labor Day weekend trying to deliver some magic I was particularly well positioned to deliver. It worked, it was a long ass weekend. However, it lead to a bunch of new people understanding what I can do at work, and has created so much more work.
• We all survive a September 21st without a new Demi Adejuyigbe video. But we remembered it.
• Michelle organized a memorial for a friend who passed away suddenly back in February. We had laughs, tutus, a pony, and all sang along to Always Look on the Bright Side of Life. It was celebratory and moving, and a good reminder to love your people, and let them know.
• A chess Grandmaster is accused of cheating in his match against the world champion… with a remotely operated butt plug.
• I decide on a whim, that since I’m turning 50 in a few weeks, I’ll buy myself tickets to go see Nine Inch Nails for the 5th time (but the first since 1999) at Louder than Life. I have a grand time, and still come away pretty sure that festivals really aren’t meant for me.

You’re making me feel like a skunk at a garden party. – Ken Starr

October

• Michelle goes bonkers with Halloween decor, and then asks for an actual human skeleton for christmas. Help.
• I might’ve eaten a box of 36 Reese’s Pumpkins over the course of the month. But only because I was celebrating the season.
• Turnt 50
• Paid off my car.
• Musk purchases twitter and takes it private. And quickly proves himself even dumber than I’ve been saying in these things for years. Please, go to Mars.

My mother always told me I wouldn’t amount to anything because I procrastinate; I said ‘Just wait.’ – Judy Tenuta

November

• Took a long weekend trip to a house on a lake with friends. The weather cooperates, the sunrises are astounding. The whole weekend is like a bonus present.
• November 26th, 2022 = March 1000th, 2020
• The Old 97s enter The Marvel Cinematic Universe with a new classic Christmas song (I Don’t Know What Christmas Is, look it up!)

I don’t want you get an idea I experiment with drugs, cause I don’t. I am into full-scale research. – Gallagher

December

• They begin pouring concrete for our garage. We tore down our old garage in anticipation of this event on February 12th 2020. We still don’t have a building up yet, but we should by next year’s review.
• Lynda Carter was trending on Twitter, but not for anything bad, just mostly people posting pictures of her from the 70s & 80s. And we’re losing this resource, people!
• Found my first Chick Tract in the Costco bathroom.
• Argentina won the World Cup. I have no idea what this really means, but I know it mattered to a LOT of people.
• HBO Max has a whole set of ‘yule logs’, including Studio Ghibli and Rick & Morty.
• We visit the Botanical Gardens and Santa Claus made me cry.

I was born for soccer, just as Beethoven was born for music. – Pelé

Pelé is one of the few who contradicted my theory […] Instead of 15 minutes of fame, he will have 15 centuries. – Andy Warhol

Recommendations

• Lego: This year I’ve done a VW Bus, a Globe, an Orchid, Optimus Prime, Van Gogh’s Starry Night, An Atari and more. And umm, I am out of room to store some of this, anyone want some completed Lego sets?
• Avoiding anything cryptocurrency, NFTs, and anything the people who are into that stuff try and pitch you next.
• Reservation Dogs on Hulu
• Wonder Woman: Historia by Kelly Sue DeConnick (and a different AMAZING artist on each of the 3 volumes)